"I can send you to heaven"

This is the weirdest thing I've ever heard from a young girl's mouth. Kids do say the darnedest things.

Well, my godmother and my mom's best friend, whom I call Aunty Jas, called me some time ago. And after talking about lots of things, I asked about her granddaughter, three-year-old Jada. Aunty Jas told me Jada was helluva naughty that day. Upon being asked why, she told me :

"She asked me, 'Do you miss Aunty Dot ?'
I miss her terribly. All those phone calls and all the time we spent together. And so, I did tell her, 'Yes, I do, very much.'

She told me, 'You know Aunty Dot's in heaven, right ?'
I said, 'Yeah....'

And good heavens, do you know what she said after that ?

'I can send you to heaven.'"

I was stunned for a moment there. And after that, we both laughed incessantly for at least ten minutes. What was that supposed to mean ? I hoped, deep in my heart, that it didn't mean driving Aunty Jas up the wall to... oblivion. No. But yeah, this was the darnedest thing I ever heard from a child's mouth. Even that TV show, "Kids Say the Darnedest Things", will never match this.