troisnyx*'s answer to naysayers

Well. Today was just like Wednesday. Only minus the worry of waiting for jury response. In the morning I had Ms Sunbeam's class, and in the afternoon I had Ms Barclay's class.

In the afternoon before Ms Barclay's class some naysayers approached me and told me I shouldn't be worrying over trivial things. Like what would've been the prom night performance. The reason being "we're not gonna get paid for the performances anyway."

It all started when I posted on troisnyx* officiel that I was out of the list. For starters, all readers - and the people whom I hold near and dear to me - all of them were expecting a recording of sorts. I broke their expectations, and I broke mine. Also, I found it meet to remind people of the kind of rejection I faced all these years whenever it came to me wanting to stage a performance. I was ever wont to face this kind of cancellation during my school years ; I especially didn't want it to happen now but it did.

And in doing that blog post, I wasn't injuring or slandering anyone. But I know full well that the naysayers who approached me did their deal of slandering me.

I'm especially worried - and dejected - about not being accepted, not because of the payment or anything. I know full well that it's a prom night performance. It's just the satisfaction of being up on stage and sharing my gift of music with the people around me. In this case, college students. In case you didn't read the previous post fully, I did mention that for the most part I had sleepless nights - I was in the midst of finalising a song which I composed - and more often than not I stayed up until 3:00 in the morning just to add in my touches. Imagine what a heartbreak it is when suddenly after you finish your own song, the next morning, the organisers call you and say your name's been scrapped off their list !

Put yourselves in my shoes, know that I'm not very much of the outspoken type unless it concerns studies or blogging.

Put yourselves in my shoes and know how I can compose.

Now, only a few people actually bothered to listen to the song I made, in full, and most of them were YouthSays friends and friends outside college - most people didn't bother to listen, and I know, because many people don't think the way I do, they won't understand what it means to me if I do perform "Kasih" in front of the college crowd. This was my first song with lyrics ever created ; I wanted a chance to share it. The college crowd never gave me a chance, and don't expect me to open up any chances for the college crowd ever again. Because if God willing, things go well, I'm gonna play hard to get : if the organisers do catch me again and tell me, because I record, they want me, I'm just gonna shake the dust from my sandals and tell them to do without me.

Now, if you're one of those naysayers who happen to read this post, troisnyx* tells you very solemnly : I had no hostility in putting up that post. And, go ahead and keep on underestimating me. Go ahead and keep on saying that my desire to sing and share my songs with others is a trivial matter. Go ahead and criticise me for putting up college posts. There'll come a time where you won't just be asking for your pictures to be put up on troisnyx* officiel, you'll even want to be given good reviews. And if you've denied this in the past, don't expect me to give it to you ever again.

troisnyx* has spoken.