The end of eternal summer

Looks like my summer vacation is... over.
Roxas, Kingdom Hearts II

It all begins tomorrow. Somewhere in a place called Brickfields Asia College. Somewhere where all the students are bound to do law. My first day of college is bound to begin. And despite my true passion being music, I took this because music does not have much prospects over here... and, need you be reminded again - our judiciary just sucks.

I've been all too comfortable in school for ten years, and now that everyone tells me college is different, I've no idea what to expect anymore. Friends ? Yes, some of them may be friends, while some of them just have that ultimatum of bringing you down. People my age range ? Yes, and even younger. There are 12-year-olds who have been home-schooled and are now studying law in Brickfields Asia College. Wonder what they are going to do with their later years... Malaysians ? Yes, and plenty. Thank God I'm not in LimKokWing. Phew ! Racial distribution ? Heck, what does it matter. I'm there to study, and study I will.

My passion for music ? Well...... somehow, things are telling me there is no place for me, or my singing, or my drums. No place in this corner of the world. What else do I expect from a people which can be so fascist, a government which goes against the law (mind you, I have my right to speak, and if anyone speaks otherwise, I defend to the death your right to say it !), a lacklustre judiciary, a place where music is of little or no importance, and a home where parents say no ? Sometimes, when I tell my cousin Narin about my predicament, I can't help but break down and cry. And I have been crying a lot these past few days. Yes, apart from these pink clouds from Jesus and these tight hugs from Narin, there are tears. Free flowing. I come to a point where I wonder what the future holds for me.

If I have to go to the extent of giving up my passion for the sake of making a living, I just might... although deep down, I'd be guilty of living a lie for the rest of my life.