Passion against circumstance

Take a good look at these lines, and decide where my interest lies.

Mom says that when I was young, I used to have a toy piano. She began enrolling me in classes when she heard me playing proper tunes on it. And believe me, I enjoyed myself immensely.

While in my first few classes, I had to undergo rhythm training. The beat of the drum left me all excited. I wonder if the rest were excited too, or afraid ?

Even as a toddler I loved singing. I remember that in church, someone gave me a yellow rosary after telling me I sang well. I still have it !

As a kid I used to drum on the bed/pillows - I still do it now.

I was quite happy whenever someone gave me a toy drum. Shoot, I kept on banging my toy drums until they all broke. That must've been harsh !

Everytime when I went for carolling sessions with my Basic Ecclesial Community (BEC) towards Christmas, I'd usually linger around those making the music. I used to live in USJ when I was a kid so there was a BEC there. Now that I live in Desa Petaling, I don't have that kind of bonding anymore because over here, there're no BECs.

As a kid, I knew how my mom stereotyped drummers ; so I was shy to tell her I have a passion for the drums. The only time I screwed up enough courage to tell her was when I was 15 and while I heard my second cousin drumming (and really well too !). I guess by then I was ready to be stereotyped...

My mother had a guitar, and I just fiddled with the strings while singing "Because He Lives" when I was young. Fine, the rhythm was proper, but the tune....

I picked up drums and percussion instinctively when I was 16.

I began composing when I was 10, but under pressure and I hated it. Surprisingly, the piece I did got a 3-star rating from Yamaha and a 4.5-star rating from Digimpro. I only returned to serious composing three years later.

I tried tuning my cousin's guitar strings, and I did the first three quite okay.... I felt guilty and cried when one string snapped. After all, it wasn't my property !

I practically sailed through all my piano examinations except DipABRSM, after which I cried because I didn't know what the examiners looked for.

Whenever I hear drumbeats, like when there is a lion dance outside, I open the window and listen very carefully to the beats. However, when my parents come, I close the windows because they hate the noise - ermm, loudness.

I like anything ethereal and breathtaking. I especially like Alizée's and Mylène Farmer's songs (both are French pop stars) because their songs are just plain genius - a phenomenon can be done out of just four chords !

I remember the period when I kept on missing the chance to beat the drums, one day I broke down and cried.

There is this inexplicable feeling within me everytime I hear a drum solo.

I sing (and imagine myself in a climax concert at the Zenith, Paris) almost everytime I get in the shower.

When I massage my mother's back, I never forget to imitate the drumbeats. Honestly, sometimes it feels sublime !

I cannot stand discord and plain chords.

I don't sightread, I improvise. This explains why I failed the sight-reading section of DipABRSM, and ultimately, the whole exam.

If someone doesn't know how to play an instrument but it sounds awesome, I come up with a new name for that "technique".

On some weekends, I sleep alone in my room - I grab a pillow/bolster, place it firmly between my legs/on my lap, and start drumming. I enjoy it !

I remember having written the entire Ressonnant score. We made it past the state finals, but not the nationals. I wept because there were still some people (like the judges back then, no offense) who just couldn't appreciate a teenager's work. This gave me the impression that I couldn't be accepted locally at all !

I'd be happy if I had another someone to beat out the rhythm with me. Well, not perfectly happy - just happy.

I think of music as a God-given gift, and probably, a career option !

I discovered remixing when I was 15 (and I am active in it now.)

Any alliance, be it a rock band or a vocal group or a drum circle would sound good to me (considering whether or not I would join one).

I weep whenever someone tells me to give music up. How can I give away His gift to me ? This is not right.